I'm a fan of this series Josh! I was in the car yesterday with my sister and we started talking about vulnerability and I mentioned something you wrote, I believe reflecting on if and when there is too much vulnerability. We actually recorded a podcast episode on the topic of vulnerability and connection.
I appreciate *your* vulnerability. It's interesting, my cousin visited our small town and changed her Hinge location so that we could see the (very few) people in a 100 mile radius. One thing that stuck out to me was how real and earnest everyone's profiles were. In SF, everyone's profiles slowly started to merge as one, the same jokes, the same references, the same dog photos. It made me sad to realize how standardized it all became. I haven't been on the apps in years though and when I heard that a man actually put effort into his photos and got feedback, I was like hallelujah!
I saw the Patreon CEO once post a video about keeping your art the same but "changing the packaging" to be conducive to virality. I think as long as you're still authentic, it doesn't matter if you got a little feedback on photos and made sure you had a few pics alone.
Final thought, I love that you shared your ideas for a relationship! I've been doing a similar exercise, it does take vulnerability to admit you want a partner and to find love!
MICHELLE how are you gonna tell me you recorded a podcast episode on vulnerability and connection and NOT give me the link?? ARGH!!!!! the inconvenience!!!
wow that's a neat anecdote! Now I wanna go touring around the U.S. changing my location to see how the profiles shift..
hahaha the over analyz-ey part of my brain is like, "how do I know if what i'm changing crosses over to inauthentic?" but I guess the answer is: do I feel like it is?
This chess YouTuber I watch basically ranted about how he can only repackage the same content so many times before he drifts into ridiculousness, but he's not ashamed because it works lol
OOOH. Are you uh.. plannin' on writing or podcasting about that?!?? I would LOVE to read that.
I have come back to deliver! When I said we "recorded" a topic I mean like a few hours before I wrote this comment haha, but now everyone can listen to our thoughts on vulnerability. We didn't end up going into the idea of too much vulnerability but Mark Manson had some interesting ideas around it.
If you do do a Hinge tour, please report back! I'd be curious to see your data points. Plus you might find your wife in Alaska which I think would be an amazing plot twist to this whole series.
Wow this chess aside is right on! I think "do I feel like it is" is correct. And also, at the end of the day it is you showing up anyway and repackaging is never going to change that. Now if you start using AI space cowboy avatars, wellll you may have revisit. Also, this is the video I was referencing though I enjoy the ala carte chess recap rant a little better: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5tkpqW-1BY
Gah. Maybe I'll write about. Walked myself into that vulnerability trap.
Yesssss I listened to it on the way home from a line dancing class in the rain! It was a total vibe. I love the community section!! Also I wish your sis good luck with her surgery!! I definitely would NOT want to know how they're gonna cut me beforehand but I would want to know afterward lol.
ALASKA?? I'd be so mad lol but I guess I'd get over it if it worked out! If it doesn't.. you don't mind flying over there, finding a sleigh and some ice dogs (idk what they're called), and dragging my ice blocked body back to the US, do ya?
it's interesting that you refer to it as a trap 👀 👀
Line dancing in the rain! What a beautiful phrase and hopefully experience! Thank you, I will let her know. I feel the same way. Less info is better. Haha if you get stuck in Alaska, I will leave you there. You can train your dogs and join the Iditarod.
I'd love a depiction of archetypes/examples of each of these modes: Unhealthy #1 Do What You Can (manosphere culture, "pull yourself up by the bootstraps", Joe Rogan-adjacent folks, etc), Unhealthy #2 Fix The System (modern self-therapizing culture, etc), Healthy Do What You Can, but Fix The System When You Can (??).
... now that I think about it, popular examples of the last don't come to mind. Maybe something worth exploring?
I'm a fan of this series Josh! I was in the car yesterday with my sister and we started talking about vulnerability and I mentioned something you wrote, I believe reflecting on if and when there is too much vulnerability. We actually recorded a podcast episode on the topic of vulnerability and connection.
I appreciate *your* vulnerability. It's interesting, my cousin visited our small town and changed her Hinge location so that we could see the (very few) people in a 100 mile radius. One thing that stuck out to me was how real and earnest everyone's profiles were. In SF, everyone's profiles slowly started to merge as one, the same jokes, the same references, the same dog photos. It made me sad to realize how standardized it all became. I haven't been on the apps in years though and when I heard that a man actually put effort into his photos and got feedback, I was like hallelujah!
I saw the Patreon CEO once post a video about keeping your art the same but "changing the packaging" to be conducive to virality. I think as long as you're still authentic, it doesn't matter if you got a little feedback on photos and made sure you had a few pics alone.
Final thought, I love that you shared your ideas for a relationship! I've been doing a similar exercise, it does take vulnerability to admit you want a partner and to find love!
oh man, this comment made my day
MICHELLE how are you gonna tell me you recorded a podcast episode on vulnerability and connection and NOT give me the link?? ARGH!!!!! the inconvenience!!!
wow that's a neat anecdote! Now I wanna go touring around the U.S. changing my location to see how the profiles shift..
hahaha the over analyz-ey part of my brain is like, "how do I know if what i'm changing crosses over to inauthentic?" but I guess the answer is: do I feel like it is?
reminds me of hte first 2 minutes of this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTocrbqGCWs
This chess YouTuber I watch basically ranted about how he can only repackage the same content so many times before he drifts into ridiculousness, but he's not ashamed because it works lol
OOOH. Are you uh.. plannin' on writing or podcasting about that?!?? I would LOVE to read that.
I have come back to deliver! When I said we "recorded" a topic I mean like a few hours before I wrote this comment haha, but now everyone can listen to our thoughts on vulnerability. We didn't end up going into the idea of too much vulnerability but Mark Manson had some interesting ideas around it.
see here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/118-vulnerability-connection/id1551186349?i=1000610520016
If you do do a Hinge tour, please report back! I'd be curious to see your data points. Plus you might find your wife in Alaska which I think would be an amazing plot twist to this whole series.
Wow this chess aside is right on! I think "do I feel like it is" is correct. And also, at the end of the day it is you showing up anyway and repackaging is never going to change that. Now if you start using AI space cowboy avatars, wellll you may have revisit. Also, this is the video I was referencing though I enjoy the ala carte chess recap rant a little better: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5tkpqW-1BY
Gah. Maybe I'll write about. Walked myself into that vulnerability trap.
Yesssss I listened to it on the way home from a line dancing class in the rain! It was a total vibe. I love the community section!! Also I wish your sis good luck with her surgery!! I definitely would NOT want to know how they're gonna cut me beforehand but I would want to know afterward lol.
ALASKA?? I'd be so mad lol but I guess I'd get over it if it worked out! If it doesn't.. you don't mind flying over there, finding a sleigh and some ice dogs (idk what they're called), and dragging my ice blocked body back to the US, do ya?
it's interesting that you refer to it as a trap 👀 👀
Line dancing in the rain! What a beautiful phrase and hopefully experience! Thank you, I will let her know. I feel the same way. Less info is better. Haha if you get stuck in Alaska, I will leave you there. You can train your dogs and join the Iditarod.
Oh gosh, whoops haha!
I'd love a depiction of archetypes/examples of each of these modes: Unhealthy #1 Do What You Can (manosphere culture, "pull yourself up by the bootstraps", Joe Rogan-adjacent folks, etc), Unhealthy #2 Fix The System (modern self-therapizing culture, etc), Healthy Do What You Can, but Fix The System When You Can (??).
... now that I think about it, popular examples of the last don't come to mind. Maybe something worth exploring?